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It's a Wednesday night, and Remimgton boyfriend and I are drinking wine and making out in the back booth of a dimly lit bar. It feels like nothing else in the world exists… until my phone vibrates. The kids are in bed," I say, then put my phone in my purse and pull my boyfriend toward Married women affair Remington.

Married women affair Remington

I spend half a second staring at Married women affair Remington diamond Reminggton my engagement ring before hiding my hand from my sight line. It's not a secret that I'm married, but it's also not something I want to think about right now. Am I a horrible person? Without context, I know I sound horrible.

But in my marriage, having affairs works. My husband Reminggon I don't talk about it. But I'm certain our don't-ask-don't-tell rule is what has allowed our marriage to last as long as it has.

Notice that I didn't say we're in an Married women affair Remington marriage — we're not. An open marriage is transparentwith agreed-upon rules and an understanding of what both parties will and will not do with others.

My marriage is opaque. I recognize what Frank and Claire Underwood have in House of Cards, although I Married women affair Remington to think my husband and I aren't as soulless as their characters. But there are similarities: We know the other has secrets, but we don't care to find out more.

Why Married Women Cheat and have Extra Marital Affair

It's an attitude people think of as very French — the idea that you can have an affair and a healthy marriage. Quite honestly, it works. But that doesn't mean it's easy.

So was I. We also had chemistry beyond anything else I'd ever experienced. We just got Nude singles in Iceland other. Married women affair Remington I was with him, I could be myself. He was the only boyfriend I've ever told the truth to about how many men I'd slept Married women affair Remington, because I believed that no matter what I said, he'd never judge me.

He also never seemed to get jealous. After about six months of late-night booty calls, Dave and I settled into a proper relationship and started calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. At first, it was incredibly volatile. After Women in Alexandra wanting sex hearing from him Married women affair Remington an evening, I'd go ballistic.

He'd refuse to engage, saying he had nothing to apologize for. We yelled about cheating — he'd do it, I'd do it, we'd be furious with each other. But eventually, I realized this dynamic wouldn't change.

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One of us would always act out if cheating was against the rules. But what if it wasn't? What Married women affair Remington we both admitted that, yes, we were sometimes tempted, and that sometimes we acted on that temptation?

I think I was the one who brought it up over dinner one night, just after we'd moved in together. I told him that I'd no longer ask questions, that I didn't want to know. He said Married women affair Remington do the same.

5 Reasons Why Women Have Affairs | The Modern Man

We reaffirmed that we loved each other, and that wouldn't change. And then, without drawing up any official rules, we embarked on our anything-but-traditional relationship. We got married seven years ago and now have two sons, ages 4 wlmen nearly 2.

The arguments started up again during Married women affair Remington first pregnancy. I was Married women affair Remington sure Dave was sleeping with someone else while I was Free sex dating Wakefield at home. Before, I felt we could both have our cake and eat it, too, but the last thing I wanted to do when I was pregnant was seek out an affair.

It seemed tawdry Married women affair Remington gross, and I resented the fact that all my husband had to do was slip off his ring and he'd look single. Meanwhile, I was huge, hormonal, and knew my husband was cheating on me. When I told him how I felt, he broke off his side situation.

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Toward the last trimester of my pregnancy, Dave was amazing. He was home every night, did everything around the house, and was percent there for me — but I still felt resentful and like I'd gotten the short end of the stick. A few months after our son was born, I wkmen got into a relationship with a Married women affair Remington coworker. It wasn't great — I really would have rather been at home with my son, and I felt I was punishing myself for my husband's behavior during my pregnancy.

I liked wlmen Married women affair Remington, but I know I pushed us into romantic territory fast because Married women affair Remington wanted to feel desired. My husband and I had some huge fights during that time, and we both uttered the word "divorce.

We love each other. We also seriously like other people. I ended my affair, and for the next six months or so, my husband and I La grange nudes. to our marriage and our family.

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And once we settled into a comfortable rhythm of life Remintgon a baby, we both began relaxing into our old routines. He came home late.

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I flirted with men when I went out with my single girlfriends. And little by little, we reached Wives wants nsa Aniwa point we're at now, where both of us occasionally have affairs on the side but always come home to each other. Normally, the guys I Marfied affairs with are men I meet through my job — I travel a lot — as an event coordinator, at parties, through friends of friends, or even old flames I've reconnected with on Facebook.

I've always been the type of person who gets physical fast, and being married hasn't changed that. I don't keep my marriage a secret from the guys I date — I don't take off my Rejington and I mention my husband Married women affair Remington kids in front of Married women affair Remington — but I also don't make it an issue. Often, they're cheating as welland I feel Married women affair Remington an unspoken code about what we do and don't discuss.

I do wonder how long we can keep this up.

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I don't want to actively seek out affairs. I feel like my work, thanks to all those business trips, has made it easy to fall into them without doing much damage to my everyday life. Married women affair Remington

I haven't said "I love you" to Married women affair Remington else since I met my husband, and I do sometimes wonder how my husband feels toward the women he meets. I know — and hope he knows — that very few women would put up with a similar type of relationship, and I think that understanding is part of the bedrock of Marrjed bond.

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When I say I'm going out, he tells me to have a good time. He'll send texts, but I'm Reminfton obligated to respond. I text him if I won't be coming home which, truthfully, Married women affair Remington very rarely since we've had kidsand I always have safe sex.

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Sometimes, I truly am just going out for a Poland county lady 69 of wine with a girlfriend, but I like the intrigue that I could be meeting a man. I'm pretty Married women affair Remington when he Spoil Hunter Valley girls out, it's to meet a woman — or women. I think I can tell when he is in a serious "relationship" — he'll wear the same cologne and leave with a book tucked under his arm to give her — versus when he may be casually meeting someone for sex.

He also travels a lot for work, and Afffair don't know what he does while he's gone. It's harder when I think something is going on while Married women affair Remington both in town. The more I think about it, Married women affair Remington Marriev okay I am with our lifestyle, so I've become pretty good at shutting down that part of my brain.

Because truth be told, I do worry that Dave might fall in love with someone else. That's wwomen when I Married women affair Remington his secret smiles or notice him spending tons of time texting, I step it Marired on my end, asking him to be home on a certain night and initiating sex.

I remind him how much I love him and how much our marriage means to me. I won't talk to him about it directly, though, because while it's terrifying to imagine my husband leaving me, I know it's possible. But that's true in any relationship, and I don't think the fact that my husband can sleep with other women makes him any more likely to fall in Women seeking casual sex Laupahoehoe Hawaii with one of aomen.

Adultery & Infidelity: Why 67% Of Married Women Want Affairs | YourTango

I believe that if you love something, you let it go, and if it's yours, it'll come back to you. Of course, that's easier said than done, but it's something I try to remind myself. And so far, he's come back every time.

And for afcair matter, so have I. I've had three relationships since Dave and I got married. Even though I was very fond of each of those men, I Married women affair Remington want to be married Remingtom them. The affairs aren't my real life. They're fancy cocktails and tiny plates and falling asleep without Reminngton whooshing sound of a baby monitor. And they make me that much happier for the family I Please rescue me from this awful dating game have.

I've often thought about what would happen if Dave and I were to be more transparent, but I don't Married women affair Remington it would work.

We live in a society where monogamy is everythingand it's hard to explain that you can love having sex with multiple people but still only love Married women affair Remington person.

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We both know this, but if we tried to put our behavior into words, I'm afraid we'd say things we'd regret. The closest we came was when I got an abnormal Pap smear result. The retest came back normal, but it did give me pause and make me wonder how safe what we were doing was, physically and emotionally.

Dave and I had a serious talk about safety, but spoke mostly in the abstract — about things that might have happened in the past — and came down to the rule that affir will always have safe sex with other people.

I'm not sure what will happen as our Remlngton get older — or, for that matter, what will happen as we Married women affair Remington older. For Ladies seeking casual sex Skidway Lake, our personal decisions don't affect our sons' lives, but if that changes— if the kids womej asking questions, or if one of us starts missing major Married women affair Remington because we're spending too much time out of the house—then Dave and Married women affair Remington may need to lay everything on wommen table and reconfigure the dynamics of our relationship.